29 Comments
User's avatar
Hobbes's avatar

I don't watch awards shows. I would sit through the credits in movie theaters, because everyone who worked on the film deserves recognition. Though, if I'm being honest, I was more likely to sit through the credits if the music was good. If I'm being even more honest, sitting through the credits allowed the crowd to thin out enough that I wouldn't feel claustrophobic leaving the theater. (Better to be seen as artsy than to have a crippling hangup about crowds.)

Regarding the issue of stupid questions, when I was in boot camp, all questions were considered stupid, so You. Did. Not. Ask. Ever. One individual did not understand how the game was played and insisted that there were no stupid questions. All of us had arms the size of tree trunks from all the pushups we had to do because of that guy. "Punitive Calisthenics" in those days did not include exercises that worked the legs, so we all looked very strange with our Schwarzenegger torsos and non-existent glutes. We worked our asses off, and that is the only time in my life when that was literally true.

Stephen Beals's avatar

This sounds like a fantastic way for me to finally get in shape. My stupid questions could finally get some results.

Jim Foster VO's avatar

There are no stupid questions. But there are a lot of inquisitive idiots.

Constantine Heather's avatar

Please always remember Rosalind Franklin when mentioning Crick and Watson🙏 She was there!!

Stephen Beals's avatar

I was just reading about that.

Shari's avatar

Thank you for taking the time to post that.

Michael Morgan's avatar

I think I was reading this too early on the morning, before the necessary coffee infusion. I read "a wood-burning pen" and thought "what kind of pen needs wood to work? Like, a steam-powered pen?" I'll see myself out....

Stephen Beals's avatar

It’s also called a pyrography pen, but I used the simple term so I wouldn’t make people google. I’m glad I did, because your thought is hilarious.

Chris Cohlmeyer's avatar

Yeah, even though I have used such a device to burn patterns in wood, I did read it that way at first cause... ahh humour maybe... OK, bye I'll try to close the door quietly.

John Smiley Garrett's avatar

I quit watching the Oscars when they quit making movies I wanted to watch. And when celebrities started acting like their political opinions and personal feelings were more important than the honors they were given.

I don't go to entertainers for political advice, just like I don't go to politicians for entertainment. Although, I do have to admit, I do get a fair amount of entertainment out of watching some politicians. Even if it's a horrified fascination, like watching a basket of cobras.

I haven't seen a movie in a theater for over ten years. Not because I don't want to, necessarily, but my prostate won't let me go for that long without having to get up. And sure as dogs pass gas after eating cheese, I'll need to go use the restroom at a critical juncture in the movie.

So I wait for it to stream on demand, or buy the darned thing, so I can put it on pause.

A Neill's avatar

That last sentence started out as a worryingly misleading follow-on to the preceding paragraph….

John Smiley Garrett's avatar

Yeah, they do tie in nicely, don't they? A whole different kind of streaming. Usually weak, and in fits and starts, though. Like having a bad internet connection while trying to watch a movie online.

Ronald Turnbull's avatar

They should televise the Nobel prizes, shouldn't they? add a bit of the old razzmatazz.

Stephen Beals's avatar

With an elaborate dance routine, of course.

Jan van Leeuwen's avatar

Is St Beals — The Movie in production yet?

Stephen Beals's avatar

Bidding has been open for the movie rights, and it’s been very exciting to watch the nonstop drama of absolutely no one bidding.

Lawrence A. Herman's avatar

I'll start the bidding at $1.40!

Lou's avatar

One place that I worked at gave me a small plastic plaque that congratulated me for my five years of work. Along with an extra week of vacation. I put the plaque in my study. One day I noticed it was missing. I asked my wife about it and she said she put it to good use by fixing a wobbly chair leg. Have a peaceful day.

Stephen Beals's avatar

That’s a very functional purpose. I used my diploma as a mousepad. That little leather case it comes in works exceptionally well.

Yuma's Freezing's avatar

I don't watch but I enjoy mocking fashion choices. Don't those people have friends to tell them they look demented and brain-dead? I think not.

DavidHill's avatar

My wife watches the awards. I provide emotional support.

Mary Braun Bates, MD's avatar

Does the coffee mug have a name?

Stephen Beals's avatar

Charlie. He was named in one sign ages ago.

Rob Bier's avatar

Wow. When my boss gave me the gift list and congratulations on my five years' tenure I had exactly the same reaction: I've been here for FIVE years? How did that happen?

DAVID's avatar

I had to stay at my job twenty years before I got anything. But it was a pretty expensive watch with some engraving on it. I worked there another 18 and got a retirement party with a cake and a plaque. The next year they went out of business.

DAVID's avatar

I finally did watch the Oscars if for no other reason than I would have a clue when a popular culture question was asked on a game show. I used to be pretty informed when it came to popular culture but that was eons ago. Like when the Beatles were young and John Wayne was still alive.

Tell Me a Mystery's avatar

Totally agree about the Oscars & all award shows. And your signs are there best! Not only do they let me test my vision, but they make me laugh outloud. And don't think I didn't notice the coffee cup falling off the desk and being caught on her ankle. ☕️ priceless!

Stephen Beals's avatar

Catching falling items with my leg is the only sport I play.